I Lost My Mother During Her Menopause Years. It Changed How I Think About Women and Rest.
There is a reason Pocca Poca is not simply another spa in Winnipeg.
It began with my mother.
She wasn't perfect, but she was the strongest person I knew.
She was the kind of woman who kept going when she was tired.
She took care of everyone around her.
And like so many women, she became very good at putting herself at the bottom of the list.
I lost my mother to cancer during her menopause years.
I would never say that not resting caused her cancer.
Cancer is complicated, and menopause itself is not something that should be blamed.
But losing her during that season of her life changed me.
It made me think deeply about the way women live.
Especially the women who spend decades being strong for everybody else.
And eventually, that experience became part of the reason Pocca Poca Spa was created
here in Winnipeg.
For Women Over 40, Rest Is Not Something We Should Keep Postponing
This is the message I especially want women in their 40s, 50s and 60s to hear:
You do not need to wait until you completely exhaust yourself before you are allowed
to rest.
Many women of our generation were taught the opposite.
Be productive.
Be useful.
Take care of your family.
Work hard.
Don't complain.
Keep going.
Rest when everything is finished.
But everything is never finished.
There will always be another email.
Another load of laundry.
Another client.
Another family problem.
Another project.
Another person who needs something.
So perhaps self-care at this stage of life needs a different definition.
Not luxury.
Not selfishness.
Not an occasional reward.
Maintenance.
A regular way of coming back to yourself.
The Rest I Wish I Could Have Given My Mother
Sometimes I look around Pocca Poca and think about my mother.
I imagine her walking through the door.
Changing into her spa clothes.
Turning off her phone.
Lying down on the warm stone.
Nobody asking her to make dinner.
Nobody asking her to solve anything.
Nobody needing her to be strong.
Just warmth to heal from your deeper core and bones.
Quiet.
And permission to stop, to breathe or sometimes to cry....
This spa is the rest I wish I could have given her.
I cannot give that time back to my mother.
But perhaps I can create it for another woman and men.
Perhaps I can remind another mother, another business owner, another caregiver, another woman going through perimenopause or menopause:
You matter too.
Why Pocca Poca Exists
Pocca Poca exists because I learned something from losing my mother that I never want to forget.
Women can be incredibly strong.
But strength should not mean endlessly ignoring ourselves.
I want my daughters to understand that.
I want the women who walk through our doors to understand that.
And I want to remember it myself.
There will always be seasons when we need to push.
There will always be people we love and want to care for.
But somewhere in the middle of all that giving, there also has to be a place where we restore ourselves.
For me, that place became Pocca Poca.
A small piece of Japan in Winnipeg.
A place for warmth.
A place for stillness.
A place for coming back to yourself.
And, in many ways,
the rest I wish I could have given my mother.
With warmth,
Mieko
Founder, Pocca Poca Spa
Winnipeg, Manitoba
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